Search This Blog

Sunday, November 23, 2014

ADHD in Church

I wrote a talk that I was able to share to my church today. I thought I would share with all of you since a big part of it was ADHD related. Many people were very loving and kind and a woman came up to me after saying her and her son were diagnosed as well. It is never easy telling people I have ADHD but it is worth it....


Today I would like to talk about gratitude; more specifically how I am grateful for the trials I have seen in my life whether physical, emotional, mental, or financial.


Elder M. Russell Ballard talks about his experience saying “Recently, a friend of mine took his son on a trip down the Colorado River through Cataract Canyon, located in southeastern Utah. The canyon is famous for its 14 miles of white-water rapids that can be particularly hazardous.


At the beginning of the trip, one of the experienced river guides reviewed important safety instructions, emphasizing three rules that would ensure the group’s safe travel through the rapids. “Rule number one: stay in the boat! Rule number two: always wear a life jacket! Rule number three: always hold on with both hands!” He then said again, with even more emphasis, “Above all, remember rule number one: stay in the boat!”
This adventure reminds me of our mortal journey. Most of us experience periods in our lives where the tranquil waters of life are appreciated. At other times, we encounter white-water rapids that are metaphorically comparable to those found in the 14-mile stretch through Cataract Canyon—challenges that may include physical and mental health issues, the death of a loved one, dashed dreams and hopes, and—for some—even a crisis of faith when faced with life’s problems, questions, and doubts.
The Lord in His goodness has provided help, including a boat, essential supplies such as life jackets, and experienced river guides who give guidance and safety instructions to help us make our way down the river of life to our final destination.” end quote.
I know I have seen many experiences in my life where Heavenly Father has made sure I have instructions, a life jackets, or a helping hand.
A year and a half ago I was pregnant expecting our sixth baby, Ryder. On top of being very huge, tired, and sore we were preparing to move to Idaho and have Russell start school. We decided to move in two trips and on the first load we thought it would be smart to move all of our furniture. I was due in just a couple of weeks but for some reason sending all of our couches and chairs away did not worry me at all.


I quickly found out that the discomfort of pregnancy was amplified greatly by only being able to sit on the floor. To put it bluntly I was not very happy and actually in a lot of pain.


A good friend found out our situation and brought over a nice, comfy, padded rocking chair. It was one of the nicest things anyone has ever done for me. I ended up sitting more and packing for our move less every day.


I was due the same day we planned to move. Ryder did not want to wait that long though because two days before we were going to move we had a small scare that encouraged me to go to the hospital and have our baby.


I was not prepared. My house was a complete mess, there was tons of packing left to do, and I was overwhelmed. I would not recommend moving and having a baby at the same time.


Alison Palmer says “None of us likes to admit that we are unable to help ourselves. Usually the need for help comes in times of crisis or change in our lives. The changes may be brief or long lasting, but they require an adjustment that makes it difficult or impossible to fulfill our responsibilities. These are the times when we ask for help.” end quote.


While I was in the hospital enjoying my new baby I found out that my good friends in the Relief Society joined together to clean, do my laundry, pack, and organize my house. I wanted to be embarrassed by how much was not done but I knew I needed help and I had to humble myself to accept their service.


Ether 12:27 says: “I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them.”


I am so grateful I had good friends who were there for me without judgement and full of love and support. Looking back now I know I could not have done that move alone.


Last year we experienced a very hard emotional and mental trial. My son Bryan was having a really hard time in school and at home. There were big problems making it hard for our family to be happy. I felt like a bad mom because I could not help my son, and I felt huge amounts of guilt that I must have gone wrong somewhere as a mother. Our family reached our breaking point where we finally sought medical help with our situation and we were able to find out Bryan has Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder also known as ADHD.


While talking with our doctor we found there were many options that we could pursue to help Bryan. Talking to our doctor was one of the best choices we have made for our family.


Elder Holland said this about  mental illness or emotional disorders “If things continue to be debilitating, seek the advice of reputable people with certified training, professional skills, and good values. Be honest with them about your history and your struggles. Prayerfully and responsibly consider the counsel they give and the solutions they prescribe. If you had appendicitis, God would expect you to seek a priesthood blessing and get the best medical care available. So too with emotional disorders. Our Father in Heaven expects us to use all of the marvelous gifts He has provided in this glorious dispensation.” end quote


I am so grateful for the help we have found for Bryan. I love seeing him happy, successful, and accepted.


After finding help for my son I felt this growing need to understand my own personal struggles. I found myself struggling with depression and feeling worthless. It seemed no matter how hard I tried I could never do all that I wanted to do. I was unorganized and emotional. I was living with great amounts of anxiety because of things I would forget despite my best efforts, important meetings, bills, or worse when I would let my kids down forgetting my activities with them.


Everyone told me it was okay and it was normal to struggle with six kids but I knew it was something more. I was not functioning the way I knew I should be able to. I searched, I prayed, and it was then while searching for information to help Bryan that I came across Adult ADHD symptoms. The struggles I have experienced my whole life suddenly made sense.


I wasn’t crazy, I was not alone, and there was help available for me. I felt a huge amount of relief and understanding. You would think after seeing my doctor for my son it would be easy for me to see him for my own struggles but I was scared. I was worried I would be judged and that people would think I could not be a good mom if I had Attention Deficit Disorder.


Elder Holland Says: “I wish to speak to those who suffer from some form of mental illness or emotional disorder, whether those afflictions be slight or severe, of brief duration or persistent over a lifetime. We sense the complexity of such matters when we hear professionals speak of neuroses and psychoses, of genetic predispositions and chromosome defects, of bipolarity, paranoia, and schizophrenia. However bewildering this all may be, these afflictions are some of the realities of mortal life, and there should be no more shame in acknowledging them than in acknowledging a battle with high blood pressure or the sudden appearance of a malignant tumor.” end quote


I knew I needed help for myself and my family so I went to see my doctor. It was last January when I was diagnosed with ADHD. I could never express fully the gratitude I feel for the help my son and I have received. We have grown leaps and bounds and our lives are better because of it.


Lastly I would like to talk about financial trials.


Last week Russell and I thought there was a chance we could move into a nicer home for our kids. We were excited about the idea until suddenly it did not work out. I was devastated. I became tired and weary of working so hard and sacrificing so much to get Russell through school. It felt as if our time to thrive financially would never come.


President Thomas S. Monson says “When we encounter challenges and problems in our lives, it is often difficult for us to focus on our blessings. However, if we reach deep enough and look hard enough, we will be able to feel and recognize just how much we have been given.” end quote.


I know together as a family we can make any place a home. It is when I remember how grateful I am for our home, for Russell’s education, for our kids, and for our marriage that I find happiness and peace.


Satan wants us to believe we do not have enough. He wants us to focus on what we do not have because then we become selfish and unhappy just as he is.


I fell into that trap of despair. Elder Uchtdorf says “Everyone’s situation is different, and the details of each life are unique. Nevertheless, I have learned that there is something that would take away the bitterness that may come into our lives. There is one thing we can do to make life sweeter, more joyful, even glorious.
We can be grateful!
It might sound contrary to the wisdom of the world to suggest that one who is burdened with sorrow should give thanks to God. But those who set aside the bottle of bitterness and lift instead the goblet of gratitude can find a purifying drink of healing, peace, and understanding.” end quote.
This last week I had to make a hard choice and quit a small part time job I had. It made it possible for us to have a little more material possessions but Russell and I felt it was not very good for our kids.


The next day after quitting my job I was discouraged and wondering if I made the right choice. Then through the day I saw my kids thriving and I could see their happiness with our new change. I knew Heavenly Father was helping me see I made the right choice.


President Thomas S. Monson said “Do material possessions make us happy and grateful? Perhaps momentarily. However, those things which provide deep and lasting happiness and gratitude are the things which money cannot buy: our families, the gospel, good friends, our health, our abilities, the love we receive from those around us. Unfortunately, these are some of the things we allow ourselves to take for granted.” end quote.

Brothers and sisters this Thanksgiving I encourage you to look through your trials and see the blessings you have in your life. I know that they are there and that Heavenly Father is aware of all of us and is aware of our struggles. He gives us so much to be grateful for and we can find peace and happiness when we remember all we have been given.

Lifetime ADHD

I'm a lifetime adhd. I was diagnosed when I was younger. It is hard for any parent to understand. It's not the end of the world. Over the years I have learned how to over come obstacles. I was the weird one in school. My friends and family didn't understand me. I have been helping parents just like yourself to try to understand "us" I'm not a doctor or pharmacist . Not a physiologist either. But I do understand what is going on. So I'm here if you need anything. Questions are helpful. Please ask. Okay a quick way to understand. Okay say you and your husband are getting ready to watch a movie. You make popcorn. Snacks soda ect.... you sit down and get cozy. And press play. Well for me the popcorn is gone. The cozy is uncomfortable and the movie is over . Now I'm on my next task. ...... we have 1000 of thoughts and where someone who doesn't have it only has one at a time. This is my experience only I can't say what other feel and think. This is my own personal information.

Wednesday, November 19, 2014

Education Support Officer

I feel very alone in my struggles. Not completely alone, though I do get wonderful support for my partner - it was he that suggested that my son might had ADHD - but our conversations seem like they go around and around, getting nowhere and the issues never get resolved.


I know the rest of my family are completely unsupported of our view that my son has ADHD. To them, he is "just a busy boy" and I need to put him in every after school activity there is EVERY day of the week "to wear him out". They are appalled at the thought of using medication - I have yet to mention to them that we have in fact being giving him medication successfully since March this year, to which they have remarked how much he has changed this year but have linked that to him having a new teacher (She is amazing though and to her credit has actually helped him so much this year! It's amazing what a teacher believing in you will do!).


My son has been active since he was in the womb. He was my first of 3 pregnancies and he was by far the busiest inside! When he was born he barely slept and I was constantly made to feel like a terrible mother because "babies that young need more that 20 min kips. I tried everything they suggested but the moment I stopped rocking or moving he would wake again. I tried walking him about in the pram - more than an hour and he was still wide eyed drinking in his surroundings! He craved movement from the get go. Crawled well before the others, ran as soon as he could walk.


He is very creative too. Could spend long periods painting, colouring, constructing with great care, planning and perfectionism. At school he is advanced in this area, as well as PE. He hates writing and reading. He struggles socially - constantly losing friends because of his impulsive behaviour and NEVER knowing where to draw the line.


Sadly the school he is at isn't on the same page as I or my partner and have labelled him a "naughty boy", giving him detentions after detentions and once kept him in from outside play for THREE whole weeks before they told me!!


I took it upon myself to educate myself further and studied Education Support and I am now a qualified Education Support Officer (an Aide to many of you). I have worked with the school to put things in place for him, IE spend time in the schools veggie garden to help unwind him before the end of lunch, I created a "fiddle box" which is kept at the office for him to use freely when he feels overwhelmed in the playground etc..

Recently things have gone downhill for him socially. He was kicked out of his after school program on Thursday at school because his behavior wasn't at a standard they expect. It was Athletics, which he loved. Last night I was approached by his gymnastics coach for the same reasons and for safety reasons.

I feel overwhelmed and at a loss on where to go from here. He refuses to listen to my concerns and I have shown him visual stories on what is acceptable behavior and talked about strategies and acted these out but it seems these slip out of his head in the heat of the moment.

Thank you for reading this. It really does help me to get this all out. while it is just the surface of my sons struggles - there is MUCH more to his story, it would be a novel to write about it all.

Wednesday, November 5, 2014

Lazy Perfectionist

Everything about ADDers is paradoxical, ironic and contradictory. I love the oxymoron Steve coined in fact to describe this "all or nothing" attitude he called himself a "Lazy Perfectionist" and that is me 1000000%!

It is either I can make my vision complete or I give up on it. I get confused, bored, and frustrated at all at the same time with the task and just give up. This is "Lazy Perfectionism" in its essence. That all or nothing attitude. In our minds eye we have the ideal in its totality- and then all the vexing and mundane details get in the way.

Sometimes we get creative when the hyperfocus kicks in and we connect seemingly disparate details together in very novel ways and find our way to manifesting the ideal. However more often than not we become like mice who get lost in a maze because we are thinking about the cheese too much. The rift between the real and the ideal, the practical and the day dream, is a pit we fall into and only hyperfocus (or chemical substitutes for hyperfocus) come to the rescue like a lifeline sent from heaven to lift us up and out of this abyss.

Tuesday, October 28, 2014

Dear Human Resources


Dear Human Resources

My name is Tarra and I would like to coach/mentor adolescence (mid-late teens) and young adults who have had a rough start in life or have a high functioning learning disorder. Yes, I know full well one needs an education for what work you do, however; not all disabilities are by the book and ADHD is not one of them. I have most of the spectrum of ADHD and trust me it’s taken me years to get where I am today as I had help threw means of PDD funding, Aish, and vocational programs that were geared to my needs. Now days that is not the case and here in Alberta one has to be severely disabled before you can get help and even then one waits several years before one gets the help they need to survive. What I offer is hope, self- worth, dignity, understanding, life skills, and organisational skills. Knowing that it is okay to be different and most of all have your own independence.


What I hope to teach these people is that ADHD is just a part of them and that it is not who they are or what they are. I hope to help them find their talents and encourage them to use those talents, as that is what could make them an income in the future. ADHD is not an excuse; it is a label to describe something a person has in the cognitive disorder sense. It doesn't mean they are inept. It means that they think differently. This brings me to my motto and belief, A DISABILITY IS AN ABILITY NOT YET DISCOVERED.
The people who helped me made me realize I was more then what many said I would never be, are the people who said I would never succeed in life. At the present time, I am on my own, engaged, working, driving and running my own business. They also said I would never finish school. The irony is I am too stubborn to let some label and medical professional take me down. I also work as a caregiver for people’s pets. I clean houses. And finally, I work for physically/mentally challenged people in their homes.
In May, 2015 I will be finishing up my HCA (health care aid program) or hopefully next year. Yes, I have a lot going on but I love doing it and want to continue doing it unless some of it would interfere with a position with your company.
What I would like to do is bring a teen with me to my client’s job(house cleaning and animal care only) and show them how to do the work as a form of experience and in turn boost their self- esteem. I would show them how to get these jobs if not find companies that hire to do things like what I do. I would also be there as a sounding board for them to talk to me.
Granted I have never been homeless, but that don't mean I didn't have a hard life. I, too, came from a rough past. Some of which was neglect, ignorance, molestation, being bullied, not being excepted. I had two abusive husbands, and dealt with sexual harassment. I have seen drug/alcohol abuse with my grandma and ex- husbands. The list goes on. However; I have never let my past bother me, no matter what. It does have lasting life-long effects that one never truly gets over. Trust is one such effect.
All I want to do is make a difference in someone’s life as others did for me so long ago. That is the gift I want to give to these young people and to show them that they are more than what others said they are and deserve something better in life other then what they are facing right now.

Monday, October 27, 2014

We can do it!

I just have to brag on myself a little! I did horrible in school as a teen, tried college right out of High school and failed miserably.. gave up, and figured I just couldn't do it. At age 45 I went to the AMEN clinic and had myself checked out scans and all. I knew I had ADHD but was diagnosed in the 70's when the use of meds was new and what they gave me didn't help, just put me to sleep. At the AMEN clinic they started me on Provigil, then Nuvigil and WOW I could focus and decided to go back to college to get a degree in Psychology with a concentration in Applied Behavioral Analysis 2010. I got my BA in 2012 with a GPA of 3.83 and I will be graduating with my Masters degree in November with a GPA of 3.8.

 I just found out a few minutes ago that I passed my last exam for me to graduate!! Still cannot believe that stupid/lazy/forgetful/disorganized me actually did this!! ADHD can make it hard, we can allow it to pull us down and defeat us OR we can learn to work with it, arrange out work or school in such a way that we excel rather than fail.. WE can do anything we set out too!! I am NOT stupid or lazy.. I am ( I say this with a smile) disorganized and get distracted easily. However, I can learn to use super focusing to benefit me and enable me to excel, I can learn to make the ADHD characteristics work for me instead of against me! I am here doing the "happy dance" because I did something I never ever thought I could.. now I want to use what I have learned to help others do the same  (big HUGE smile)

Saturday, October 25, 2014

They might have ADHD


The other day I had someone scheduled to come and take family pictures. I got my family ready, bribed them to smile and listen, everything looked good except the photographer was not there. Where is she? I knew I had the date and time right (yes the rare occasion) but she was not there. I called, texted, left messages on her e-mail and Facebook. I was pretty frustrated and told my husband “She might be ADHD.”

About 45 minutes late she called me back and headed over right away to do photos. She said she forgot. I won't lie, I was not happy. When she arrived though she was sweet, fun, and very nice. By the end of pictures her personality won me over and I really liked her.

She apologized for not remembering our appointment and I said “That is okay, I am ADHD so I try and be patient with things like that, I am not sure if you know what that is…” and she said “Yes I do, my son has ADHD and I have it too.”  We talked for a little while about being diagnosed and the struggle.

I remember being that girl forgetting appointments and running late feeling horrible when someone would call and remind me. It was never fun and I always felt horrible. It was another good reminder to be patient with others because you never know what they are struggling with. They might have ADHD.

Monday, October 20, 2014

Misconceived Soul


HELLO MY SHINY FRIENDS!!!  My name is Amy Lynn Pottorff. I'm sorry if my intro is a little long...it's sooo hard for me to be concise and break things down without losing too much detail. 

I support ADHD Awareness! October is ADHD Awareness Month 

For most of my life, I always knew there was something different about me. I struggled with fitting in. People often found me overwhelming. I cried at the drop of a hat. I couldn't sit still.....unless I was crafting or playing video games---that I could do for hours on end. I have always wanted things to be nice and neat and in their place and I get easily stressed out when it's not "perfect." I was constantly getting reprimanded for interrupting people. Having to do anything I wasn't interested in was torture. I was a master at starting off projects like a rockstar and horrible at the follow through. 

All I wanted in life was to be normal. It killed me inside that other people can do these simple tasks but for me, it felt like there was an invisible force holding me down. I hated that I couldn't make friends and began a vicious cycle of being a people pleaser in order to make people like me and be my friend. In the end, I had NO CLUE who I was.


I got married, I had kids. Still I felt like I was living the way I should live to make him happy and stay with me. When I had children, l was constantly in a state of feeling overwhelmed. I couldn't understand how what seemed so easy for other moms was sooooo hard for me. I was criticized, called lazy and crazy more times that I can recall. 


I was 28 when I was diagnosed. It took 
me a year to accept the diagnosis which was officially ADHD w/ OCD tendencies and Bipolar Disorder. The road has not been easy. I am divorced now. Since then, I have finally begun to find out who I really am and stops fighting this invisible illness that I cannot control. The struggle to live a normal life is tough. It's hard to maintain relationships because most people believe ADHD isn't real. Not only is it real, it's passed though genetics and you can't grow out of it.Which means, if you have a child that has ADHD, chances are---you or your spouse have it too---and if you have it then one of your parents has it too. So far--1 of my three daughters have been diagnosed (1 has never been tested-the other one is too young). Both my sister and my mother are suspected to have it and I have been diagnosed.

ADHD effects the prefrontal cortex in the brain which controls sustaining attention over a delay, inhibiting distraction, and dividing attention. It also controls behavior and judgement as well as emotional responses. Most importantly--THERE IS NO CURE. Symptoms can be relieved with medication...but medication can also dull what makes a person with ADHD so special.
Being ADHD doesn't mean you're a bad person. It just means you don't think the same way as other people and you do & learn things differently.

Awareness is the key to reducing the stigma!!



I share my story to raise awareness.

I am no longer ashamed of my diagnosis and who I am!

Shine On My Shiny Friends!!


Read more at Misconceived Soul

Sunday, October 19, 2014

I won't Apologize for ADHD

My 9 yr old son has ADHD. He was diagnosed at age six. His mind doesn’t work exactly the same way yours and mine do. He is not always in control of what he does and what he says. My son is a bright, beautiful boy. He has such a HUGE heart. He tells us he loves us 100 times a day. He gives the best monkey hugs. He has empathy like I’ve never seen before in a child. He loves babies and puppies and new life. He is extremely animated and hysterically funny. He is wicked smart and tests off the charts in math, reading and spelling. He was born to play hockey. He asks a million questions a day – always thriving for knowledge. He is compassionate, sweet, kind, loyal, considerate and polite. He’s a bit socially awkward – something we work on every single day. He doesn’t always think about the consequences of his actions but it’s not to be malicious. He doesn’t understand why he does the things he does sometimes. He is constantly adjusting and learning new ways to cope in this world. We are doing our best to raise both of our children to be well-rounded, open-minded, independent, and caring people.

I’m tired of feeling like I should apologize to people who don’t understand my son. Who don’t care to understand kids with ADHD (or any other disorder). I can’t crawl into the close-minded, small world you live in. I don’t want to. If you are not willing to wrap your brain around the world you live in, the world your children live in, there is nothing I can do for you. It’s not my job to open your eyes. My child will do that for you. He will grow up and do amazing things with his life because he was loved, he was encouraged, he was shown that, no matter what, you can do anything you put your mind to. As a parent, that is my job: to take care of my children – to love them, to guide them, to teach by example, to learn from mistakes, to grow, to support, and to inspire. Do I wish that my son didn’t have ADHD? I can’t really say – I’ve only ever known him as he is. I wouldn’t change a thing about him or his life just to make it easier for you. I love all of his bits and pieces – I love the whole of him. Exactly as he is. Please don’t make me feel like it’s an inconvenience for YOU that my child was BORN with ADHD. He didn’t choose it, but he is dealing with it – I suggest you do the same.


PS: Our son is on medication and it's made ALL the difference for him and our family!! We struggled with the decision to put him on meds but after we saw the results, we knew we made the right choice for him. He is thriving in every way!!

Tuesday, October 7, 2014

Deadline

 I have always done my best work (at school & at work) when under the gun with an immediate deadline. To try to capitalize on that, I've tried to start making indulging in distractions contingent upon getting other tasks completed. When I find my attention being drawn away by 'fun' stuff ("I need a new couch. I should check out the inventory on the websites of every furniture store near me", "On second thought, I could sure save a ton if I bought one on Craig's List...", "Wow, look at all these pianos on Craig's List. I sure would love to have a piano someday..." lol) -- instead of doing it immediately, I write it down. 

First thing every morning when I get to work (well, when I remember to at least!  ), I make two lists: on the left side of the page I write down between 3 to 6 things I want to focus on accomplishing that day, in order of priority. Then when stuff like what I listed above pops into my head, I write it to the right of one of the tasks on my list. (I try to match short things higher in the list and stuff that will probably take longer near the bottom of the list). Then as I cross stuff off my to-do list, I allow myself that little reward of distraction (which I try to set a time limit on -- still working on enforcing that more consistently though!)

Sunday, October 5, 2014

ATTACK THE ADD/ADHD IN YOU!!!

SO, you have ADD/ADHD.  Big whoop!!!  So I have this idea that i thought would help us get through a few small projects at home during the day or evening or whenever you have time.  I'm a preschool teacher.  One of the ways kids learn is through play.  Learning with games is fun to them.  So i thought i could maybe help YOU and myself in a little game called "Attack the ADD/ADHD in YOU".  One thing is all you have to accomplish in order to play this out.

I know you guys have all heard this before.  Set a timer, decide what you want to do and do it, create a schedule of cleaning days, yadda yadda yadda.  Well, i'm about to tell you once again to do that same thing BUT, i wanted to make it into a game for you AND for me.  I have the hardest time with doing things i say i'm going to do.  I never finish a project that i start, and when i do it takes me forever, and i procrastinate anything that has a deadline involved.  I think we all know that we have this thing called ADD/ADHD that attacks us, in other words, it may give SOME OF US limitations to what we can do or to what we THINK we can only do.  Instead of letting the ADD/ADHD attack us, I say WE attack it first. 
How do we do this?  Those of us who have ADD/ADHD may be affected more so than others who have it, and those who are not as affected by it may not have as much of a hard time as some of us do.  Either way, i think we can all have a moment of ATTACK the ADD/ADHD in YOU!!!!  So here is what i think of when i say:  ATTACK THE ADD/ADHD IN YOU!!!  (I hope no one gets bored with this)  I want to list at least 25 things if not more, if you have any ideas, please feel free to add on to it.

 1.  if you have been trying to clean out your kitchen cupboards (or whatever), set your timer or just go do it right now, not all of them, JUST ONE!  If youre feelin froggy, well then, continue on.  Once you have finished, you have attacked that ADD/ADHD.  Then get on your ADD/ADHD Facebook, and share with us what you did, how many, how long it took you and how you felt after you got it done FINALLY!!!! (after saying it for over a month that you're going to get it done).  If you cant focus, or stay on task, thats fine, do one tomorrow when you get up, before you go to work, or when you get home from work or even before you go to bed.

 2.  Clean that toilet bowl.  Set your timer or just do it right now, get on facebook and share how long it took you, or better yet, race a friend from your ADD/ADHD facebook page.  ATTACK THAT ADD/ADHD!!!!!  Just one thing is all you have to accomplish.  I dont care how big or little this project is, share it!!!!

 3.  Hey, you know that dirty spoon sitting in your sink or that piece of paper sitting on your floor that you keep walking by, but not cleaning it or picking it up, do it right now.  ATTACK THE ADD/ADHD.

 4.  Ok, just so you all know, I am playing this game too.  And i will share what i have done as well.  My biggest problem is getting my car cleaned out.  SO, as soon as i get that done (or at least part of it) i will share what i have done.  If you feel the need to share pictures, and it makes  you feel better, then do that of course.  So your car, get busy on it.  If its clean AND VACUUMED, great, find something else to do.  People, my car is so awful, you would  think i LIVE in my car.

 5.  Laundry:  Wash, dry, hang up or put away.  If you cant focus on all of it, hang up 5 shirts (or whatever you can handle).  Or work on doing all of it in a matter of 10-20 mins at a time.  If not, lay it out, go get some fresh air, eat something, then come back to it, but get it done before the night is over, if not do it before you go to work. Remember, if you need to, set your timer, try to beat it, most importantly, ATTACK THE ADD/ADHD. 

 6.  Sweep and mop!!  Even if that's all you do tonight, just do that much.  If not, just sweep.  If you already did, then go mop that floor.  Don't forget to share what you did.  If you don't want to share, that's fine too.  This is only for encouragement. 

7.  Vacuum:  I know i have been trying to do this about every other day.  It just doesn't work out for me.  If you have a moment, go do it right now.  ONE BEDROOM even!!  Or just the living room area. 

 8.  If you don't feel like doing that boring chore that you know you have to do, now is the best time to do it.  ATTACK THAT ADD/ADHD. 

 9.  Put ALL your groceries away.  If you cant, do one bag at a time, and come back later for it.  But please put your frozen stuff away at least.

10.  If you are feeling/or have felt sluggish, tired, irritable, fatigued, and you have been talking about "walking" to release some stress, go do it.  (Well, here it is or was raining cats and dogs, but when the weather permits, do this).  Even if you walk around the corner of your house for 5 freaking little minutes, so what.  That's probably more than you have done in a week or a month (if not more).  Build yourself up to 10 mins.  Then for 15, then 20 then 30.

11.  If you are working on homework for hs, college, or whatever, do as much as you can each night.  (I can say that i do this).  Every night, i work on just a little homework and try hard to understand as much as i can.  My b/f helps me, so hes good in math, so far i have NOT quit or dropped out.  But i'm still struggling.  For me, i try to work on some each night, even it its an hour (sometimes more).

12.  Read to your children.  If you have not done this, stop what you're doing, go read to them.  Go cuddle with them for 15-30 mins before they sleep.  Those are precious moments.  You will never get them back, don't worry about other things you have to get done.  They will be there when honey bunny goes to sleep.  I did this when my boy was little.

13.  You know that cluttered space next to your bed, in the living room corner, or even say....the laundry room?  Yeah,  get busy on it.  Set that timer, race a friend, or just say 1, 2, 3, go!!!  Start it, and pick up what you can for just a few mins.  Pick a time that you want to spend on it, or even better, just clean that cluttered space, then reward yourself.  If you want, do it all and then do something else that needs to be done.   Time yourself to see how long it takes you.  Remember, whatever amount of time you spend getting SOMETHING  done, it doesn't matter, its about overcoming that ONE ADD/ADHD problem and feeling a sense of accomplishment.

14.  Clean that glass table that you have been meaning to do for the past week.  Set a pretty decor on it so you will feel better about it being clean.  If you keep it clean and you dont have a center piece to put there, reward yourself and go get one.

15.  Find a place to put those shoes.  Papers, books, get them out of the way, put them away. 

16.  Load up the dishwasher, start it, let them clean, don't worry about it until the dishwasher is done.  Then, put them away.  (I hate dishes), but sometimes i have to make myself do it the very moment i notice it just so i don't have to worry about it later on.  Even better, put every dish you use in the dishwasher so all you have to do is start it up and no dishes in the sink.

17.  Do you mow your lawn??  I do.  For one, its great exercise, two, I don't like for my yard to look like shit, and three, i hate to be outside doing any kind of work including gardening, so decide how long you want to mow for.  If you can only stand to be outside for 15 mins at a time, mow for 15 mins, then take a break.  But get back out there and finish for another 15 mins.  If you can do more than that, great.  If you want to, do some today, and do some tomorrow.  I will usually do mine in one day because i can handle doing the whole thing because it normally takes me about an hour to do it.

18.  My dining room table is a big rectangle glass table that sits 6 people.  Perhaps i should downsize since no one uses the table to eat at, instead, we all pile everything we own on top of it.  Dishes, water bottles, papers, books, pens pencils, computers, left over food, homework, notes, and so on.....  Its a struggle just to get and keep this table clean.  One of my many to do's on my list of ATTACK THAT ADD/ADHD.  What is YOUR clutter space?  Attack and declutter

19.  Do you have "another world" living under your bed?  Oh, that's got to go.  Crawl under there, and get rid of those garbage aliens who stole your pens, and those dirty underwear....eeewwwwwwww.

20.  Lets talk about those end tables right next to your couches.  The ones where the lamp sits on it, and you have a few picture frames with your loved ones it.  Attack, de-clutter that table, and throw away the trash and empty cans or bottles so everyone can see your pretty picture frame with you and your mom/dad/daughter/son/husband/wife.

21.  STOP!!!  Stop letting that trash can in your kitchen overflow.  That's the smell in your house.  Take it outside, then pour some vinegar and warm water in the trash can to clean it out and give it a fresh scent.  Make sure to put a garbage liner back in there.  Do it right away so you don't forget.

22.  Clean your windows, use water and vinegar.  Clean 1-2 windows a day, or decide that the windows will be your project for the day.

23.  You cant see it, but there is dust in your room.  There is more in your living room, your bathroom, your dining room.  Just take a wet paper towel wipe over it, or use the "tools" from you vacuum cleaner.  Remember, just doing this one small project can be your biggest accomplishment of the day.  If youre feelin really good, while you have out the v-cleaner, go ahead and attack those couches too.  Lift up the cushions and get all that junk out.  You will feel so much better.

24.  Overnight bags:  I hate packing, I hate unpacking.  So when you come home from a trip, put those dirty clothes STRAIGHT INTO the washer machine, get out your clothes you didn't wear and just take 5 mins to put them away.  Where does your overnight bag go?  Mine goes in my closet towards that back since I don't need it every day. Got dirty clothes on the floor, pick them up real quick, throw them in the washer too.  Badda bing badda bang!!!!



25.  One of my biggest problems is that I accumulate so much garbage around me.  I just don't get up right away and throw it away like I should.  SO, where ever you spend most of your time, (for me, in a chair at the end of my dining room table), keep a garbage can near you.  Throw your stuff away while youre sitting there, and it wont collect garbage on your table.  Put one by your bedside, BOTH SIDES, and even in your car.  Put 2 small ones in the back on the floor board and one in the front passenger side, keep a laundry basket and/or garbage can in your trunk.  No trash or laundry will pile up. 

Making it through each day with ADD/ADHD is an accomplishment in itself.  Remember, be good to yourself, no one else is going to reward you for following through on these everyday projects, but YOU CAN!!!  No one has to understand WHY, as long as you do.  I speak to myself just as much as I speak to you all about these little and big tasks that seem so difficult for US, but so easy for everyone else.  Remember to share your accomplishments (if you so choose), and tell us how much you did at one time, what you did to reward yourself for staying on task, and following through with what you have been saying you're going to do for over a months time.  I will share mine too, be honest with yourselves and everyone else too.  If you were not able to get anything done, its totally fine.  Get up, and try again.  Attack the ADD/ADHD!!!!

Friday, October 3, 2014

Weight Loss Tips

 If you are thinking about losing weight I would try these tips:

*Count Calories. For me I am doing 1200 a day, my doctor said never go less than 1000 but I would talk to your doctor about what would be best for you. After losing the weight I can eat more calories because I am switching to maintaining my weight.

*Eat lots of protein. If you do yogurt do Greek yogurt, protein bars, jerky, chicken, eggs etc. This will help you keep the muscle and lose the fat.

*Get rid of all junk from your house and stop keeping it easily accessible but instead have plenty of fruits and veggies on hand.

*Drink plenty of water. Drink a cup before each meal and if you feel hungry it may actually be thirst. Limit drinking anything else but water.

*Eat slowly



*Get enough sleep

*Have low calorie hard candy. If dessert is chewy you will eat it faster and more of it.

*Exercise but make sure to do strength training as well. The more muscle you have the easier it will be to keep the weight off long term.

*When you do cheat and eat too much don't feel guilty and let it ruin your goals just get back on track as soon as you can. Also having something fatty does not mean it has ruined a whole day. I have had fast food or donuts on occasion and still stay on my calorie goal. Many restaurants will have a list of calories on their websites.

*Take a before and after picture. If you are not sure if you want to exercise that before picture will help you get motivated haha and it will also help you see the change even if the scale does not show it.

*If possible do it with your spouse. Having the support is great and knowing you both have the same goals makes it easier to succeed. 

Tuesday, September 30, 2014

Have you been there?

I can even shamefully admit that I did the whole bring to school when school was not scheduled. I brought my daughter to school; there were cars in the lot so with that I didn't even question no buses, I figured the lack of buses meant I was late. I drop my princess of with a kiss and an I love you only to get home and have a call from the school.... You see; it was election day; hence the cars, & school was off. Thankfully the office ladies were there and my frantic daughter had then call me. She was in fifth grade. This is the minimum of the incidents of forgetfulness. One time while meeting family for dinner, we go to leave in our car and as my lil shiny went to get in she dropped her ball; I told her to forget it lets go. I heard the door shut and away we went. Again I get all the way home while thinking she's awfully quiet, hmmm. I was thankful for the peace. I get in the driveway and tell her to go in the house. ... NO RESPONSE. I think that's strange; I didn't even hear her get out so I call for her. I normal call quickly turns to terror as I now realize; I forgot my child at the restaurant. I call my family being please please please . Tell me you have my daughter. THEY thought I was teasing when she walked up to their car and said mommy left me. They thought I was teaching her a lesson. I broke every traffic law known to man in efforts to get her. This definitely was not one of my brightest moments. I just get so wrapped up in everything else it's like I go on auto pilot and for some one to wave off my course. .... I don't even have the capacity the receive it in my brain. Until it's over.

About Me

My photo

Our ADHD Story is a place where people can share their stories, thoughts, and feelings about ADHD. Get past the generic list of symptoms and see how it is affecting people in real life through personal stories. We are not here to inform you, we are here to engage you.